What the Prophet (saww) taught us about anger

The Power of Controlling Anger: What the Prophet (saww) Taught Us

Anger is an emotion we all experience, but few of us take the time to reflect on how we manage it. The Prophet Muhammad (saww) gave us a powerful piece of wisdom about anger when he said:

“The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger.” (Sahih al-Bukhari)

This hadith is a profound reminder of where true strength lies. It’s not in overpowering others, but in mastering ourselves, particularly in moments of heightened emotions.

Why Anger Rises So Easily

Anger is an interesting emotion to study, because not only does our body rise to anger quicker the more we use it as a reaction but it also masks so many emotions. Just take a second to read that over again; 'your body rises to anger more quickly, the more you use it as a reaction.' It's impuslive and perhaps that's why explicitly we were guided to control it. There is a wisdom in knowing how damaging to yourself and the relationships you are in to rise to an anger beyond your control.

Many things have been said in anger, unable to repair the damage, and many relationships have broken down as a result of uncontrollable rage which surfaces only to cause chaos. I think the purest of all relationships - that of a mother and child shows us just how much damage anger can cause.

The thing to note is that we are humans and we were created to feel this emotion - in times of when we cannot express ourselves, in times of impulses and succumbing to our nafs and ego and in times of when we feel undervalued or overlooked. It is important to recognise that controlling our anger brings us closer to Allah (swt) especially if we set the intention to please Him and attract His barakah in our behaviour.

اللهم إني أسألك حُسن الخلق

"Allahuma inni as'aluka Husnal Ikhlaq"

How to Process Anger More Effectively

I’ve found one thing to be an absolute game changer when it comes to processing anger: pausing and staying quiet in the heat of the moment, and instead, turning to journaling.

Now, I know it sounds easier said than done, but when we respond in anger, we are responding from an emotional state. Our rational, logical mind takes a back seat.

Of course, in the heat of the moment, you can't exactly pull out a journal and starting furiously writing away in it. That's the time to practice pause and if you know this situation can get out of hand and you react impulsively, practice a few phrases that may allow you to leave the conflict and take time out.

If you would like to explore this further, these are the ways I am currently taking on clients and helping women unlock the power of emotional intelligence and spiritual growth in their lives.

Check out Mubasshira's testimonial on my website to learn more about how she overcame anger and rebuilt her confidence.

Journaling, allows us to shift into that rational mindset, to look deeper and develop the self-awareness that in future will help you either to stay silent and let the heat simmer or communicate effectively why you invalidated by others.

Here’s why this works in detail:

1. Understanding the Root Cause: When you journal, you are able to dig deeper into why you feel angry. Are your boundaries being crossed? Are your feelings being dismissed? This clarity gives you the power to respond, not react. Once you know why you are reacting this way, you can learn the steps you need to take back control. This is the main emotion we cover in my Eight Week Coaching Program - Pathway to Emotional Regulation - it comes up frequently as a cause of conflict and rage and so it's the most transformative experience to gain control.

2. Gaining Perspective: Journaling allows you to step back from the situation and see it for what it truly is. Instead of letting anger cloud your judgment, you can assess if the response is truly warranted. If it isn't, you can spend time harnessing the power of effective communication so that next time you are able to speak up instead of suppressing your inner feelings.

3. Emotional Release in a Safe Space: Writing down your thoughts and emotions helps you release the pent-up feelings without lashing out at others. It gives you a safe space to process the emotion. I cannot express just how important this is.

By pausing and writing through your feelings, you are essentially rewiring your brain to process emotions in a healthier way. You’re much more in control, and that’s where real empowerment lies.

Ready to Gain Control Over Your Emotions?

Learning to manage and control emotions, especially anger, is a skill — one that takes practice and guidance. This is exactly what we cover in Week 4 of my PER - Pathway to Emotional Regulation Coaching Program. In this 8-week journey, we dive into techniques to manage emotions like anger so you can respond with calm and clarity instead of regret.

If you're ready to take back control of your emotional wellbeing and live a more peaceful, balanced life, let's work together.

Sign up for my Pathway to Emotional Regulation Coaching Program and start the journey to emotional mastery today.

By blending the wisdom of our faith with practical tools like journaling, you can break free from the grip of anger and strengthen your inner self. The power to control your emotions lies within — it’s time to tap into it.

Want to learn more?
Find me on Instagram at @themuslimahcoach and explore how you can develop emotional resilience, personal empowerment, and spiritual growth through my coaching programs. Visit my website at muslimahcoach.com for more details or alternatively you can contact us using the form on my website too.

Controlling Anger | Prophet’s Hadith on Anger | Emotional Regulation | Emotional Resilience | Journaling to Process Emotions | Spiritual Growth | Managing Anger | Pathway to Emotional Regulation | Personal Empowerment for Women